Now the weather is changing, and daily life is changing too. We're well into the school yer, and this year all three of us are at school - T as a teacher, me as a student, and N as a brand new daycare child. The transition has been tough on all three of us. T is teaching SAT prep classes in the evening this year, and subbing during the day. I have my heaviest class load yet, and several extracurricular activities. N is in daycare twice a week, all day long, and with father-in-law the other days. I feel like we never see each other any more, and I can already feel the toll it's taking on our connection as a family. N is a different baby already - less relaxed and smiley, more likely to scream and cling, less interactive and interested in his world. But I have no choices left in this. I have dropped him down to as few days of daycare as possible, and he's still becoming increasingly listless.
Two and a half months. Only two and a half more months until my hardest semster ends. In mid-December we can reconnect, N can leave daycare, and maybe T can take a week off so we can spend some family time. I look back on our empty summer days now and see all the opportunities missed. Could I have taken N to the playground more? Should we have skipped that TV show and played a game together instead? Maybe I could have run those errands another day, a day when the sun wasn't shining and the park wasn't calling to us to come explore. But those days are over, and I missed those chances. It's time to live this day, to make sure we don't miss any of today's chances. It's time to go grab N, give him a snuggle, and play a game. Opportunity calls.